Why Is It So Hard to Take a Breath? Understanding—and Overcoming—Our Resistance to Mindfulness

This week I happened to have a few calls with old colleagues turned friends and some of the same topics came up, one of which being resistance.

Specifically, resistance to the habits we know are good for our mind, body, and soul - the things we "should" want to do to make the rest of our day and lives more enjoyable and fun and energized.

You've likely experience the same. You already know something like a bit of mindful breathing or a quiet walk can help you recharge, but somehow, it feels like yet another thing on the to-do list and often the last thing you want to do when there's so many other things going on.

Why is it so hard to take a few moments for ourselves, especially when we know it’s good for us and good for everyone around us?

Why do we resist the recharge and instead choose to further drain our energy?

Resistance is that feeling of hesitation—or even dread—that creeps up whenever we try to change our routine, especially with behaviors like mindfulness. It’s that voice in the back of your head saying, “I’ll start tomorrow,” or “I don’t have time for this right now.”

Part of this resistance is wired into our brains. We’re built to conserve energy, so we instinctively lean toward the habits and routines we’ve already established, even if they’re not serving us well. When something new doesn’t promise an immediate reward, it can feel hard to prioritize.

This is especially true of mindfulness.

Many new clients dismiss the benefit and value of more mindful, intentional thoughts and behaviors, especially when they're focus is on a goal related to physical health.

I get it because I am 110% guilty of this myself.

Mindfulness—while immensely beneficial—isn’t something we feel an immediate “win” from, especially in the beginning. Our brains are reward-driven, and we’re far more motivated by quick results. When we try to slow down or focus on breathing, our brains might start searching for quicker “hits,” like checking emails, scrolling, or just moving on to the next task.

Taking a pause, however short, can feel like you’re letting the momentum slip. Ironically, this resistance to slowing down is often what keeps us from finding that energy and balance we really want.

3 Tips for Better Habits

• Start Small—Like Really Small. Start with something so easy it’s almost hard to skip. Set a three-minute timer once a day, maybe right before lunch, and just breathe. This isn’t about mastering meditation—it’s about gently introducing a mindful moment. Over time, those three minutes can naturally expand if you’re ready for more.

• Attach Mindfulness to Something You Already Enjoy. One way to bypass resistance is to pair mindfulness with something that already brings you joy. Maybe it’s a cup of coffee in the morning or a walk at lunchtime. Start by being fully present during that activity—really savoring it. Over time, you might find that mindfulness practice easier to carry into other parts of your day.

• Lean on Accountability. Find a coach, or a buddy or a coworker who also wants to be more mindful and check in with each other. It could be a quick text: “Did you take a mindful moment today?” Knowing someone else is on this journey with you makes it easier to stay committed, even on the busiest days.

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Whether it's changing your own personal behavior, or motivating behavior change in others, these same tips apply.

We can't control what others do (and we shouldn't try to unless we want to drive ourselves crazy), yet we can provide support in choosing a different path.

This may be especially relevant if you want to support others in achieving their health goals or support your team at work in both their hustle to hit their target and in doing so in a way that contributes to their well-being and energy instead of only pulling from it.

A few weeks ago I shared a guide on how to create a healthier worklife from the lens of personal change, leading others, and leading teams. If you haven't had a chance to check it out yet, grab the download and see what resonates for you or what might be helpful to share with others.

1 Last Thing...

The first step is the hardest.

And you can do hard things.

Taking time for mindfulness can be a game-changer for your energy and focus. Start with one small action, one deep breath, or even one sticky note to remind you to check in with yourself and a friend.

You don’t have to do it all, and it doesn’t have to be perfect. The goal is just to start.

Today, take a moment for yourself. You might be surprised at how powerful a single, mindful breath can be in helping you feel more balanced, more present, and a little more in control.

Take Action!

How will you use this information today?

What ONE small action step will you commit to?

Write it down & set a reminder to check your follow through.